Monday, August 31, 2009

What is a military wife?

They may look different and each is wonderfully unique, but this what they have in common.


Lots of moving---
Moving.
Moving.
Moving far from home.
Moving two cars and two dogs----all riding with HER of course.
Moving sofas to basements because they won't go in THIS house.
Moving curtains that won't fit.
Moving jobs and certifications and professional development hours.
Moving away from friends, moving toward new friends.
Moving her most important luggage; her trunkful of memories.

Often waiting-
Waiting, waiting, waiting for housing;
waiting for orders;
waiting for deployment;
waiting for reunion;
waiting for phones calls;
waiting for the new curtains to arrive;
waiting for him to come home for dinner----AGAIN!

They call her 'military dependent', but she knows better.
She can balance a checkbook.
Handle the yard work.
Fix a noisy toilet.
She is intimately familiar with drywall, anchors, and toggle bolts.
She can file the taxes, sell a house, buy a car, or set up a move, -- all with ONE Power of Attorney.
She welcomes neighbors that don't welcome her.
Reinvents her career with every PCS; locates a house in the desert, the arctic, or the deep south and learns to call them all 'home'.
She MAKES them all home.
She is fiercely IN-dependent.

Military Wives are somewhat hasty.
They leap into decorating, leadership, volunteering, career alternatives, and friendships.
They don't have 15 years to get to know people.
Their roots are short but flexible.
They plant annuals for themselves and perennials for those who come after them.
Military Wives quickly learn to value each other.
They connect over coffee, rely on the spouse-network and accept offers of friendship and favors and record addresses in pencil.

Military Wives have a common bond.
The Military Wife has a husband unlike other husbands.
His commitment is unique.
He doesn't have a job, he has a 'mission'
he can't just decide to quit
he's on-call for his country 24/7
but for you, he's the most unreliable guy in town!

His language is foreign:
TDY
PCS
OPR
ACC
BDU
And so, a Military Wife is a translator for her family and his.
She is the long-distance link to keep them informed the glue that holds them together.

Military Wife has her moments----
She wants to wring his neck,
dye his uniform pink,
and refuse to move to Siberia.
But she pulls herself together.

Give her a few days,
a travel brochure,
a long hot bath,
a pledge to the flag,
and a wedding picture.

And she goes.
She packs.
She moves.
She follows.

Why?
What for?
How come?

You may think it is because she has lost her mind.
But actually it is because she has lost her heart.
It was stolen from her by a man who puts duty first.
Who salutes the flag.
And whose boots in the doorway remind her that as long as he is her Military husband,

she will remain his Military wife.

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